Tag: #advice

My random advice column. Wisdom and female knowledge that probably every girl should know.

The epitome of Tussi

Paris Hilton is one of my first big idols. 1 Night in Paris might even be the first porno i ever saw (not 100% sure though). The album Paris is still in my Spotify rotation, Bottoms Up (maybe the most underrated movie of all time, a drug-free Jason Mewes, David Keith as gay uncle and Paris as basically herself) and of course, Hottie & the Nottie also rank high on my fave movies list. Even though mediocre, i have read Confessions of an Heiress multiple times. She is just the OG Tussi - whenever people ask me what Tussi really means, i always answer it is bimbo-lite, think a young Paris Hilton :) i adore her for sooo many different reasons and on more than one occasion i pretended to be her :D

Now we have the Kardashians and even though in all honesty Kendall is way hotter than Paris ever was, none of the Kardashians can even come close to Paris' fashion sense. Paris wouldn't be caught dead in most things they wear outside of work. So here is some timeless fashion advice from the Princess herself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlbjyPCQQjQ

Some timeless key points to always keep in mind:

  • Miniskirts should be the size of a belt.
  • Always wear heels. 
  • Pink! 
  • Always dress like a princess. If you do, you will be treated like one. 
  • There is no such thing as too many rhinestones.
  • No crop top is too cropped.
  • Always look like you are having fun.

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You can always go higher!

With Shoes, there is only one rule to follow: You can always go higher. It does not matter what you are doing, it does not matter where you are going - push yourself for higher heels. Wear the highest you can get away with. You'll need lower ones for hiking than you do for clubbing. But what matters is, the next time you do the same activity, try a tad bit higher.

Start with lower heels if you have to, it is not important how high you can go now, all that matters is that you improve yourself and slowly, but steadily get to higher heels.

You can wear uncomfortable high heels at home until they feel more comfortable and then go out wearing them and start wearing higher ones at home. At home, you can easily rest and sit down. So it's the perfect place to train your feet and break in new shoes. And don't tell me you are not feeling like a supermodel walking in your underwear and high heels through your apartment. Be proud of your femininity. But keep improving.

Always push yourself, always improve yourself. Never think "this is too high", if you apply yourself, you can always go higher.

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Be the reason!

Be the reason someone masturbates today. You can't always fuck all the Men you meet, but you can inspire them. Masturbation is a wonderful thing, no one ever felt bad while doing it, right? So be positive. Inspire the world to be a better place.

There is literally no bigger compliment to us girls than a Sir getting hard because of us and then even fapping with nothing but his memory of our body on his mind. This is honest appreciation. This, dear girls, is the high life. So, be the reason someone masturbates today!

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Girls are so kissable. 

Girls are supposed to be kissed. They are soft, warm, and tender. You don't have to be a man to enjoy a girl's body. You don't even need to be a lesbian or bisexual to enjoy another girl's lips. We taste so sweet and even smell dreamily nice. It is no wonder girls kissing each other is such a hot topic in pop culture.

A girl's sexuality is primarily for Men to enjoy anyways and Men certainly like it when Girls Kiss Girls. And for us, it is fun too. It can be such an easy way to turn Men on and it is definitely a good way to catch a Man's attention. So even if you don't enjoy kissing another girl that much (why though?) it still has some incredible benefits.

In Austria, we usually kiss the cheeks to greet someone, but my girlfriends and I, we kiss each other on the lip. No tongue though, just a tender peck. Open tongue would be hot, but you gotta start somewhere :)

Sometimes i just wanna kiss girls girls girls. So you can go for it too! Enjoy how awesome girls are. Don't leave all the pleasure to the Men.

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First Times

For a long time, i didn't understand what Men find hot about this. A girl licking a toilet or other non-sexual but icky things. But nowadays i know that it isn't about sex, it is about dignity. A normal person wouldn't lick the toilet, but a dirty whore would. That means by licking the toilet the girl admits to being a dirty whore. She shows that she has no boundaries, that she will do anything for him. Often it does not even matter what it is she does, as long as she does it because he wants it (and would never do it without him demanding it). And the more repulsive the action is, the more turned on the Man gets.

By debasing ourselves, by lowering ourselves to toilet licking whores, we can attract male attention. Every girl can look pretty in a dress, it is not that difficult. And while it is also not technically difficult to lick a toilet, most girls get stopped by their pride and dignity. Only by being able to overcome those burdens, we can show Men that we are worth their time. We can show them that we don't act inside the normal morals, that we are not like all the other girls, we are better, more fun. Of course, toilet licking is here just an example, not every Man will be into this particular action, but what they are into is into pushing the boundaries of what is considered "normal".

In that sense, it is kind of a test. A test if we are ready to submit or if our pride and dignity have ruined us. When it comes to sex Men have a very dirty and creative mind. There will always be new things that they invent. Just look at the porn industry. One would assume that by now every kind of porn has already been shot but yet the industry is booming with more and more videos coming out each day. Men don't want to let their sex life get stale, they need new things. So while it might have been enough to show some ankle 150 years ago, today Men need more. They need dirty sluts. They need us to throw away the "morals" of society and go the extra mile. Where it once has been showing some ankle, then maybe some knee and now we are in a time where clean-shaven pubic hair and anal sex is expected.

It won't stop. It will keep going. Men will need more and more, we can't just sit back and relax on the basis that we once licked a toilet. No, Men need more and need it repeated. You cannot do things for the first time twice. Once you degraded yourself in a certain way, you can repeat it but you can never make happen for the first time again. With each repeat, it will get easier and more normal. That is why morals shift - there will always be people on the edge of what is "normal" and push the boundaries a little further. And after a while, it is not seen as weird anymore and a new normal gets created.

So keep in mind that with every degrading action, with every defiance of your pride and with every renouncing of your dignity, you shift what's normal a little bit further. And every first you give your Man just ingrains you in his brain. A Man will not remember the 10th blowjob he got, but he sure as hell still knows everything about the first time he came into a girl's mouth.

Do your research and check the porn sites for new stuff. Look at what is trending, those are the videos Men are watching. Watching something is the first step. After they have seen plenty of it, they will want to experience it. So prepare by watching the same videos and get used to the ideas in porn. Over time even the most degrading actions can appear normal to us, use this to your advantage and always be one step ahead :)

Of course, this does not mean that this is all Men want. Men want a variety of things, they are quite complex beings. But porn, sex, and degradation go hand in hand. Every Man is influenced by them to some extent. Some more and some less. But it never hurts to dismantle any pride you might feel. Pride never helped anyone, it is poisonous. With dignity it is the same. No girl ever got her prince charming because she was the most dignified. No Man ever had an orgasm from respecting a girl.

I had this epiphany a while ago while watching one of my favorite movies: Mini's First Time. It is a movie about how things are only really fun the first time you do them. And once they are done, there is no way of undoing them and each repeat is just an echo of the first time.

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Silence is Golden

One thing Men really don't need (especially after a long workday) is a waterfall of words when they come home. This does not mean Men don't care about us, but they are not as communicative as we are. They need their quiet and rest to recharge their energy.

Also one of the main reasons why a man wants a divorce is a nagging wife. Nagging can be really harmful (even to your Man's health) and sadly, nagging happens automatically when we just word vomit whatever comes to our minds. We tend to talk for the sake of talking because we want to communicate with our Man and we want to include him in our life. The problem, however, is that Men can't differentiate between what is important to us and what is just word salad. Men tend to focus on problems and want to provide us with solutions, so whenever we bring up problems to them they feel the need to solve them. That can put a lot of stress on them (especially when they are listening to us instead of recharging their batteries). So even if we don't mean to nag them, we often do so by accident. 

It is important to reduce our communication (while on the other hand, it is important for Men to increase theirs) so we can meet each other somewhere in the middle. This is where gags can come in handy. It is easy to restrain yourself from talking when you have a gag in your mouth. It makes us think about what to say and prioritize the information we wanna give our Man. As a special hint to Men: gags can also be super useful during movies or sport watching if your girl has the tendency to talk over the TV.

Don't cheap out on gags though. It is important to get a comfortable one. First, you have to get the size right. You probably have to try a few different ones, but i prefer ball gags with a slightly smaller ball. Don't go too cheap on the straps however, they need to be easy on the skin too. A full muzzle can be super useful and comfortable too, but the act of putting it on and off can be a bit of a nuisance.

Now comes the most difficult part. Dear Sirs, i know that when your girl is gagged you feel super relaxed and you could let this go on forever. But it is really important that you give your girl her talky time. She needs to vent, she needs to talk nonsense and most importantly, she needs you to care about her life.

So gag her when you need your quiet when you need to rest some, when you need to get some energy back or when you just need some me-time. This is perfectly fine. She doesn't need to talk 24/7, even if she wants to. But keep the clock in mind. Your girl needs her talky time as well. You can limit it and move it to when it suits you best, but you cannot get rid off it. This would only lead to an unhappy girl. But keep in mind that when her talking gets to much, you can gag her again. Just be fair about it and be sure to give her the attention she needs.

Please make sure she doesn't see it as punishment but as an important part of your relationship: quiet time. With young kids "quiet time" is an important thing in their education. And never forget that girls are like young children, so it is often wise to use tips for kids' education when dealing with us.

i really believe that gags can increase the happiness of any couple. Like most things in a relationship, it is best when the Man is in charge and sets the right priorities. He has to handle it fair though. Remember that you are the boss, you decide. But your decisions have consequences and your job is to keep the relationship flourishing. So take what you need but give what you can :)

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Don't forget about Ass

We are often so focused on tits and how bouncy they are and how men just love playing with and staring at them, that we forget that girls are way more than just a pair of tits. We are a bunch of ass too. Unlike tits, you can actively work on your ass without any surgery. Just do your exercises and practice daily (but don't overwork it). And soon you will have a jiggling ass like the one in the GIF. Your ass is important! Don't neglect it.

Having a fine piece of ass can make the difference. Men always look at tits first, but then they look at our ass. Long and sexy legs that melt into a tight and round ass, that is what male dreams are made of. And this is also what they see when they fuck us from behind, this is what they see when they open up the door and let us walk through, this is what they see when they discipline us. Men spend a very long time looking at our asses, so girls, do your exercises and don't forget about ass.

Remember Nicki Minaj, "My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun". And you do want that anaconda, hun :)

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